to here, 72. Beyond?

In approximately 19 minutes ( @2pm on August 30) I will have been 72 hours ( 3 days ) without a single cigarette, for me this is amazing, and shocking. I started when I was 23 years old, and am now 27. This is monumental for me as I have been attempting to quit now for probably two years.

I'll be the first to say that only 72 hours in is by no means victory, but if you have ever struggled with this or read anything about smoking cessation, these first few hours are the leprechaun at the end of the rainbow, or better the allusive rolling football; always awkwardly just out of reach, and only making you look more the fool as you stumble after it.

I am excited to have made it this far, and hope to continue this, but i will say a couple things.

Coffee is NOT better with cigarettes, I can taste it so much better.
My face has already cleared up a bit, read about it, it will surprise you.
I am breathing better, although, I do have a bit of a cold and that is hindering things in a way, but i feel as though I can breathe far deeper, and at a more decelerated rate, while not getting winded quite as easily.

As i finish this up I would like to restate, I am by no means through with this, but I am well on my way. To here, this moment, it's been 72 hours, and beyond...(?)we will see. But I have my fingers crossed.....

A new one

So, I love to do this thing, where I go to coffee shops when I'm out of town. When I enter these shops, I make it known that I work in coffee as well, but I do it by getting them to talk about what they're doing until they ask if I work in coffee. They usually figure it out because of how focused the questions are, and not that they are rude or "know-it-all"-ish, but my curiosity seems to always get the best of me. I want to know everything about the shop. If they have a roaster, then what type is it; does the person that I am talking to roast; if not, is the roaster is in; if you don't roast in house, then where do you get your coffee from; if you do, where is your coffee imported from; all of these questions.....?

Today, I finally got to go to Primavera Coffee Roasters in Birmingham, Alabama. This place is one of the most perfectly crafted coffee shops that I have ever been to. They have an Ambex roaster (15kg) that does all of there roaster. The music was at the perfect level, and created the warmest ambiance. The coffee was divine, and fresh; the tea was loose leaf and steeped with a knowledge of how it should be treated (a.k.a. weighed, temperature tested, timed, and served in a ceramic mug).
The barista greeted me, explained everything, and, as is always the plan, eventually asked me if I worked in coffee, and then I got to talk about our lovely Blackbird Coffee, which always makes me smile, because we have worked so hard to make it be what it is, and is becoming.

If you are ever in Birmingham, Alabama, do yourself the favor of stopping in this place, the capps are velvety smooth; the teas attentively attended to, and the service is the embodiment of modern southern charm, probably wearing plaid, skinny jeans, and glasses (whether they need them or not) but all the same, more than happy to offer suggestions, and advice, with a smile and care.

Having a great time in Alabama with Laurene,
Chris

beauty

It is interesting, at the least
to look at what i find intriguing
a backlit certain hint of a sepia-ish tone
all the while basking in vivid dark color
this covers the world in which i dream
juxtaposition, sort of....to an explainable extent
a world much like that picture
of my parents, that hangs above the lamp
in the living room, the one that they took for their engagement
it has aged, but the smiles captured haven't
or like the ones we try to duplicate
with photoshop or one of the cameras from "Urban"
I wish for that moment every single day
Just as the sun sets up half way
below the blackened horizon
the time when sun dresses
do exactly what they're made for
to make each girl glow from head down to toe
when straw fedoras and cotton golf hats
are less fashion and more function
they block the sun from people's eyes
so they can smile for those pictures
the ones where even grass blades glow
with a white brownish sort of lining
music plays in the background
no certain sound except the sound
that causes casual relaxed smiling
of comfort and control
yes i sometimes wish the day existed here
in the latest parts of early evenings
of early summer and late spring.
in backlit, sepia-ish evenings
filled with deep dark color

watch it brah!

So there's this thing that is happening
an unavoidable, happening thing
and no one is happy, while no one is sad
just perplexed, uneasy, and a little bit mad

you see there's a line
that most dare not cross
and then once they do
they've put on a cross
the morals that called them
to do what they do

you, respected sir, stand far and wide
and blatantly on what is quite the wrong side
of this our beautiful Stirling Bridge
that we will defend to the nth degree

you see there's a line
that most dare not cross
and then once they do
they put on a cross
the morals that called them
to do what they do



I don't know that poetry is really my shtick, but this poem wraps most of feeling towards recent developments surrounding me. I know good and full well that these developments are unavoidable. There are aspects that I enjoy about the coming challenges but there are also thoughts of how nice it would be not to deal with any of this. So here's to the future for better is challenge than never knowing your worth.

The Roaster, the teacher

I am a big fan of a certain type of education. I am not sure of the correct terminology for this style of learning, but am enthralled with the option and the benefit that is evident because of it. Watching others for minutes/ hours/ days/ months/ years- do something that can't be learned without experience. I term this apprentice learning, which I would assume to be a loose description.

Here recently I, and a couple equally as worthy peers, have been given the responsibility of taking over the roasting program for Blackbird Coffee in Milledgeville , Georgia, as well as our sister store in Dublin, Georgia on a small batch roaster. This coffee shop sits just a little under a block away from Georgia College and State University as well as sitting in the center of Milledgeville's downtown, to say that we stay pretty busy is an understatement.

A little back story:
In December, our Roastmaster, Don Harris, went for a two week vacation, and was planning on returning after the new year. After he and his wife returned, she was in a car accident the following week that handicapped her for a bit and he had to step down from roasting for an indefinite amount of time.
It is now the middle of march, and we have been roasting now for roughly 3 months time.

Back to present: apprentice roasting.
I had been watching and talking to Don for the larger portion of the time that had been working at Blackbird, and soaking up every moment I could of his experience as a roaster. None of that could have prepared us for taking over the entire roasting program.

I should stop here to say that this is not a note on being overwhelmed, rather, it is something that has brought a new challenge to my life. I work a lot...., but I love what I do. It has been and still remains, an intimidating and entertaining experience from the moment we took over up until the moment before and during each time we roast. We have experienced a massive exhaust fire, and learned how to put it out. We have had the notes of all of Don's past roasts to read from, and have had the ability to meet some very experienced peers in our industry to learn from.

I guess you could call this a sort of experiential learning. When we started roasting we simply followed the directions that Don had been following, and as time has progressed we have started to develop our own style, with each roast. Slowly adjusting in some areas, working hard to maintain in others and learning new things as we go each time. As I stated early on, this is the way that I love to learn, under the constant tutelage of an experienced teacher. So far I have found this to be my favorite of all the tutors that I have had. The funny thing is the description of the unnamed teacher. Its name is Ambex, and it is the 33lb roaster itself. Without this device I would not be able to do what I do, but every time I visit with the massive thing, I am taken aback buy its sheer power and ability. This may seem to end cheesy, but this machine is what I have learned the most from, listening to it's every utterance, and noting every change, to the best of my ability. The roaster has been my master educator for the past three months, and from the looks of things, will remain one of the most cherished learning experiences that I have or will ever have had.

I apologize for the rather scatter brained nature of this post but, this thought kind of overwhelmed me and I just wanted to "jot" it down.

Thank you, if you read.

an old barista

Yesterday, I had a wonderful shift.

I pulled quite possibly the best shot of my life! This is a feeling that is quite possibly only understood by baristas, for those who aren't, I excelled at my job when I did that. It was a feeling of payoff. I have been practicing for moments such as this for three years now, and it happened. It's much the same as when Mark Lemke would hit a home run(for those of you that remember the old Braves baseball player). You practice away learning to get good hits, ones that land you at least standing on base, but then everything lines up and you connect and the ball sails over the fence; only in this instance, it took 9 atmospheric bars of pressure, my 19 grams of Blackbird Coffee's house espresso, a spotless 4oz demitasse cup, saucer and silver spoon, and 26 seconds but I was sailing over the fence.
The flavor profile was amazing, and my tongue went wild with appreciation, experiencing this from beginning to end:
It all started with my taste buds at a rest being segued, and not shoved surprised, but ushered into an overwhelmingly pleasant green then black cardamom lasting only for seconds, somehow then transforming into a sharp raspberry- or maybe lesser cranberry tartness (but pleasant) middle that made my taste buds dance as if my tongue were a ballroom floor and then it immediately and finally disappeared into a perfectly smooth and creamy dark caramel that stayed with me for the rest of the 4 to 5 o'clock period remaining on my shift, never once going sour; never once going stale; never once going bitter....then it disappeared, vanishing without a trace.
That was my day yesterday, that was what hit me today as I realized yet another reason I love what I do.
Again, and again, and again, I cannot wait to learn more.
I cannot wait until I am an old barista. Until I have had many more of these experiences.

I cannot wait until I am an old barista.

-Chris

It takes love - Dr. Illy

it is just not fair.
and life is just that way.
fair is located in vacant parking lots.
for two weeks max, they can overtake a street.
or reside permanently on a place called Coney.
that is life. I guess.
we do with it what we can.
build our own fair, can we?